Y13 D127

 Day two of four done with these people. Yesterday was just annoying. I got through maybe 65% of the material in the time available. Why? Because they don't pay attention, they don't speak up and ask questions, they don't confirm that they have finished step, and they don't have good technical skills. To be fair, I am broadly generalizing and out of 15 students it's 6 or 7 that are causing the headache. The rest are doing okay. Just making for a long day. I didn't finish until about 7:15pm again.

After class I had to put together a new shower caddy pole thing. Ours after at least 5 years went sproing. 10 minute easy assembly! sayeth the box. An hour later I was done. Then I had some soup because I wanted to put zero effort into things. B went to bingo because it was her grandmother's birthday and to get out of the house. She didn't stay the whole time because it was uncomfortable sitting too long, but at least she got to she her grandma. She got home around 9:30.

I watched some tv, spent time with B, and went to bed. Two more bloody days of this.

Y13 D126

Yesterday was rough as anticipated. Things really started getting challenging around 5pm. That's when I start to lose focus, get distracted, etc. Doesn't help when a couple of the students are not 100% either. There's 14 people total registered in this class, plus 3 "observers". Which is a bullshit way of a client getting more people in a class without actually paying for them. My observers asked more questions and were more trouble than my actual students. As usual for this client, more than half were up to 5 minutes late. Par for the course. None of my management team or sales team can understand why this bugs me so much. I'm sorry, but it's fucking disrespectful. Plain and simple. I am waiting on you to show you something. You're wasting my time and I hate it. I had at least five students who said nothing all day which is just as bad. Interact even a little please? Meh. One day down, three to go. Today is the material I don't like because it's theoretical stuff and is less tangible for demos. Lots of talking. Thursday and Friday are more straight forward and will just be cranking out demos. 

I'd have more to discuss but these classes literally are my whole day. I start them up at 10:15, I shut down at 7:15. Not much time in between to do anything else. Before class I had a snack, after class I had a grilled cheese. Watched some TV with B, We did something else, can't remember, but it was some household thing. Next thing you know, it's 9:30 and I am getting ready for bed. I did have a nice chat again with my sister. She's got so much going on, I don't know how she does it. Very proud of her.

Okay, five hours until next session. Whee!

Y13 D125

Today begins 4 days of 11-7 bullshit with a bunch of Indian contractors who are going to be late, non-interactive, rude, and just plain shitty. The whole group might have some good people in it, but the bulk fall into that other category. I know I should let past classes influence me, but in 10 years I've had very few interactions with this client that have proven frustrating for me. Let's just deal with it and get through the week.

Yesterday I taught a good group. Second class with this group and I like them. Interactive, smart, and in my time zone. All key points to a good day for everyone. I think I am really cranky about today because of the time to be honest. 

Planned out my next bay area trip. Looks like I am going Dec 15th - 18th. Taking one of those days to meet with work people, the other for ink. Not staying long or visiting a lot of people. Just a quick trip but want to get one more in before end of year. I won't make a ton of points or miles this year and I will probably lose airline status, but it is what it is. Not much I can do about it now. 

For dinner I made pork chops. They were okay. Not the best cut of chop and so they weren't quite as tasty as I would have liked. After dinner B and I took a ride. We went over to the Home Goods and Ulta. I dropped B at home goods while I went to Ulta. She was looking for some specific pillows and other random stuff. Me, I was looking for a curling wand and other random stuff. I was successful. B was not. When we got back home we tried out the new products I got including a face mask. Then we curled my hair. OMG it looked so good. I wanted just like beachy waves and we managed to get the look I wanted. My hair looked like I had just surfed all day. Perfect. I also had a good talk with my sister. She's having some medical issues again. Hopefully they can figure things out. Seeing the doctor this week. I do wish her and I had grown up together. I might have had a lot less anger when I was younger. Who knows.

Speaking of doctors, B had her first official check-in. Everything is healing well. Weight restriction and mobility restrictions lifted! Yay! Stitches all look good. They started B on estrogen to get things normalized. This is and always will be one of the things that angered me with X2. She never did any HRT or real proper follow up after her surgery and that impacted a lot of stuff. At least B is smart about this and has done a ton of research. B knows what it will take to be healthy again. Thank goodness. 

Alright, let's go kill five hours. Sigh. 

Y13 D124

Yesterday was a lot of self care. We finished the puzzle we've been working on. Did a manicure. Trimmed my eyebrows. Cleaned up walnuts from the backyard. Finished Solasta. Made chicken enchiladas for dinner. No big issues, no drama. Just a good Sunday at home. Weather was nice. Not too cold, not too hot. Had a good chat with my sister. She is having major problems. Hopefully her doctors can figure out what's going on and help. Overall a decent way to ease into the week from hell.

This week I have five full days of teaching. Four of the 11-7 with the world's shittiest group. Not looking forward to that.

B has her follow up appointment today with the doctor. Fingers crossed everything goes well.

Y13 D123

A nice relaxing quiet day. The biggest thing we did was water changes on all the tanks. Didn't leave the house, didn't deal with people, and didn't have any expectations. We watched the rain while working on a puzzle and it was good. I made steaks for dinner, we watched some tv together. This is the kind of day I needed. As a result, there's not a whole lot for me to report here. Which is not necessarily a bad thing. May all of you have a quiet, non-excitement filled, boring ass Sunday. I plan to have one. 

Y13 D122

Yesterday was a wild ride and that's putting it mildly. Let's start though with something amusing. Last Saturday I said to B "I'm going to sleep in tomorrow" to which she replied "Or 6am". I woke up at 6:04. Was thinking the same thing last night. I even went to bed later to try. Woke up at 6:22. Well, at least I managed to sleep 18 minutes longer. Go me. 

The big adventure for yesterday was my hair. I woke up in the morning and there were these weird lumps in back. I figured it was just some weird anomaly, took a shower, and tried to condition and comb through what I thought was just a tangle. Nope. It was still there. It was like my piece had moved and was either on top of my hair or the piece hair had gotten underneath. Plus I could see some separation at the scalp. I was freaking out. I sent an emergency email to my people at the hair place and they managed to squeeze me with a 6pm appointment. Great. Only 12 hours of freaking out. Fun. In the meantime, I had a ton of other shit to do.

Such as a therapy appointment. That went well. Her and I have both acknowledged that the first few sessions are getting to know you and sounding board centric versus problem solving and I am fine with that. We discussed a bunch of different topics and I felt good leaving. We also put a plan of topics together for our next two sessions to make sure we start moving towards problem solving and don't miss anything.

From there I had 10 minutes to get home and get ready for meeting 1 of 2. The first meeting was to discuss the second meeting. I have two sessions coming up in October with a client for some private training. The client requested an hour long meeting yesterday as "pre". WTF? Fine. The problem is this is a custom class and I don't even have the materials ready. Woops. So the first meeting was to go over the materials that we should be delivering. That meeting happens, then we immediately go into the second meeting. That actually worked in my favor because there were large chunks he wanted removed because he didn't feel the students would have the skills. Perfect. See, we're trying to cram four days of material into two. The more you want stripped, the better.

Finished that meeting and had lunch. While eating the hair place called and said they could take me at 4 if I could go in early. Yes please! So after some more work, I headed out. I explained what was going on and it turns out, I had two extremely gnarly mats in the back of my head. What the heck??? After a lot of discussion we came to the conclusion that between sleeping, pulling it up, and most importantly, insufficient brushing, I had managed to create my own dreadlock. See, as backwards as it may sound, I was being too gentle with it. I wasn't brushing through enough twice a day. I was lightly brushing which wasn't detangling it and everything else was just making that worse. Fuck. 2.5 hours later I was able to leave with it fixed. It took her almost 90 minutes to get the mat out but I lost A LOT of hair. So now we may have to push up my next unit to Nov instead of Dec. Fuck me. I ordered a new bottle of hair dye to bring in to my next appointment. We also had to move my part from the middle to the side because I lost a lot from the front. Sad panda. It still looks better than my bald ass head, don't get me wrong, but you can tell it's thinner. Sadly, that makes it look more natural on me. Fun times.

Got back home after 7, made me a pizza, watched TV and then had even more fun. B decided to try and be social for the first time so she was at her friend's house (more on that in a minute). While there, her grandma called her. One of the smoke alarms was going off. B couldn't get there quick enough AND we didn't want her stretching to reach the alarms. At 8pm I headed over. Turns out one of the alarms was burnt out and her carbon monoxide needed new batteries. Double threat. Got that resolved, got back home around 9:30 and B got home a few minutes later. Yes, as you might imagine, she pushed herself. Mostly it's because she was sitting for those few hours she was out and sitting is not comfortable for her right now. She immediately went to bed to go horizontal and oh look, you feel better. I am so shocked. I was wound up and didn't go to bed until 11:30 or so.

Today we have no plans. Making some steaks for dinner. Get B some iron and protein to heal. Other than that, video games and relaxing. May your weekend be boring too. 

Y13 D121

My fucking ear is stopped up again. Why?? What the hell is going on with it?? At this point I should go to a doctor. Goddammit.

Yesterday was a good and bad day. My class was fine but I swear it's like everyone knows when I am teaching. I have gone days lately with no emails but the minute I start teaching everyone wants a piece of me. I got more emails yesterday than in the last 3 weeks. Whatever.

Made chicken casserole for dinner. Quick and easy. Touched up my hair. Went to bed.

Have multiple meetings today. It's going to suck.

Y13 D120

I finished recording my class yesterday and thought I would have a pretty smooth rest of day. Nope. A client that I am teaching in October decided they want to schedule an hour "pre-training discussion". WTF? I got the sales guy involved and even he was like WTF? We're both worried this guy is going to try and pull one of those "use our data" bullshit moves. Now normally this wouldn't be an issue, tell him No and move on, BUT this class I realized yesterday, I don't have the material for. Our other guy was originally on the call and he's been teaching this material OFF HIS HEAD. Son of a bitch. So now I have to scramble, figure out what he's doing, how he's been teaching it, etc. His style has never worked for me. See the problem is, he and another guy we brought in initially to teach this topic, are not trainers. They're consultants and they approach it that way. They look at it in how to do I get paid more from these people. Not how trainers do it. We teach the material and move on. We have nice scripted material with nice scripted demos and we don't deviate. It's cookie cutter because it needs to be. But this guy has been just going from topic to topic. I don't have the same level of knowledge on the tool that he does which means I can't do that. I am a little pissed off that it was sold this way. It's also four days of  material crammed into 2. WTF one more time. We're meeting tomorrow morning 30 minutes before the client meeting. Let's see if we can make some peace with this. 

That was my major issue for the day. Is what it is.

Made a nice lamb burger for dinner. B had gnocchi. B had a rough day. Their meds are almost gone and they are starting to wean off. Some headaches, tiredness. Then like a dumbass, she pushed herself in the evening trying to do stuff with the axies. Finally got her back in bed. I know it's boring staying in bed, but dammit, you need to heal. Monday is her two week visit. Just stay healthy until then. Sheesh.

Today I have a full 9-5 class. Thank god. On material I wrote, I know well, and I am comfortable teaching. It will be a long but rewarding day finally.

Y13 D119

I hate being part of the problem but sometimes need outweighs social responsibility. Case in point, B has been drinking these specific drinks because they contain things she needs to heal, stay hydrated, and more importantly, she can mix meds in them to help with things. The store only had a few bottles the other day when I went and she ran out last night. Originally the plan was to go this morning and get more, but no guarantee they would even be in stock. Let's hear it for Amazon overnight. At 5:05am, a case of the drink was delivered to my front door. Same cost as the store. Now I have at least a week or more to find them in store and stock up, but I also have a backup plan. Is it good I made a driver work overnight? Is it good I support penis head? No, but my wife needed something and that trumps all in my brain.

Had a rough day yesterday. In the middle of recording a class when I get to one part of the demo and everything breaks. WTF?? Turns out someone deleted my database. Motherfucker. By the time it was all sorted out, I had lost three hours of recording. Now I have to make that up today. Whatever. At least I have a good reason for not being done. That's how I spent the majority of my day, recording and waiting. More of the same today. Tomorrow I teach! Woo.

Made soup and sammies for dinner. B was doing pretty good up until about 6:30 when pain happened and a migraine set in. Hot flashes have also been occurring. Wild ride. Doctor check in on Monday. Hopefully they will start the HRT which will balance out some of the issues. Wish us luck on that.

Started raining last night around 5. Supposed to rain all day. Finally. I like rain. Rain good.

Y13 D118

Finished the new class I have been working on! I was stuck on getting one piece of code to work properly in a demo and finally figured it out. I was coming at the problem from the wrong direction and when I flipped my thinking, BAM, it worked fine. These little lines of code were all that I needed to get right:

library(reshape)
dataset <- melt(dataset, id=c("Class", "Manufacturer"))
output <- dataset

Stupid, right? Yep. Welcome to my world. But it's done now. Go me.

Made little pizzas for dinner. Technically they were pre made little pizzas from the fancy store so I embellished them slightly with some add-ons and flavored the crust, but it was a quick, easy dinner. B's grandparents stopped by for a brief visit on their way home from up north. They brought gifts! Woo! They brought three bags of corn for the critters outside, a pound and a half of smoked whitefish, and gummies for B. We're their favorites. Yep. They won't say it out loud, but we know it. B is continuing to work on her puzzle and got a large chunk done yesterday. I would expect her to finish my end of week with no problem. Did feeds last night. If there's one thing I want B to hurry up and heal for, it's that. Doing feeds every other night is exhausting. Just a lot of tedious work dealing with these things. Especially since they're on a schedule and I can't start feeds until 9pm at the earliest. For me that's a challenge. I'm already sleepy so it's tough. But it's done until Wednesday and that's all that matters.

Recording today. Plus a marketing team meeting. Bleh.

Y13 D117

Had a decent day. Tried to keep B company for a large portion of it because she is getting restless sitting in the bedroom. We worked on the puzzle my sister sent together. Inevitably she got tired and needed rest. She also ended up watching Anastasia and Hamilton. Made chili for dinner. Have a class this week on Weds. Next week I teach a full five days! Yay me. So just got to get through one more moderately slow week first. Not much else going on to be honest. My ear is still going back and forth. Blocking up at night, releasing during the day. No pain so no warrant of going to the doctor. It's after labor day so shows are starting to come back. New stuff to watch. Whee.

Y13 D116

My ear popped yesterday. Such relief. But it's back on its shit today. Not as bad as prep-pop but still blocked. It just needs to drain. Let it do it's thing. It doesn't hurt any more which is good. Just blocked. Fun. 

No scary dreams this time. Just a typical boring one about travel. I was on my way to Belgium this time. That's a new one. But luckily nothing scary or freaky. I'll take that.

Went to the grocery store yet again yesterday. Did feeds on the axies. B's mom finally came by for a visit. It was a little strained by overall pleasant. Apparently she sent her boyfriend packing. He hasn't worked in 18 months and his depression was getting worse so she told him to get his shit together and come back when he did. If she was still single fine, if not, oh well. Good for her.

My ribs came out perfect. I was very happy with the end result. No falling off the bone but a nice tug while still being extra tender. The dry rub I did before came out really well. I would do this procedure again. 

No plans for today. At least none that I know of. Hair washing day. That's all I have on the agenda.

Y13 D115

Day six of ear issues. Three more and I go to urgent care. I don't have any pain today, just blockage which hopefully means it will pop soon. Hopefully.

Had my first session with my therapist yesterday. It went well. No matter what I get out of it, I now at least have a place where I can go and just brain dump without judgment. In some ways that's all I want. I totally get people who go to strip clubs, pay for back room dances, and then just sit there crying. I get it. Sometimes we just need someone to talk with about all the crazy in this world. I really am not looking for problem solving but rather just empathy and listening. 

B is on the mend. Getting really bored of being in bed. We tried taking a short car ride last night to get dinner and she made it most of the way without issue. A little bumpy on the way home caused some dizziness and nausea but we got home without incident. Another week or so and she will be doing well. 

Starting ribs in 20 minutes. 12 hours at 165 degrees. I prepped them last night so I just have to warm the water and drop them in this morning. Me smart sometimes. At 8, fancy grocery store. Then sometime today I am going to work on cleaning the cat room because it smell. It smell bad. Can't figure out where the smell is coming from though. So I am going to be lifting all tiles, cleaning, and replacing the litter in all four boxes. It's a lot of work, but if it kills the smell, it will be worth it. Joy.

Y13 D114

It's one week since they sliced B open. She's doing okay. Stitches and incisions are starting to hurt. All the drugs are finally coming out of her system and what's left is pain. Fun. But mentally she claims to have never felt better. Good. Makes it all worth it.

Did a webinar yesterday. Not my best work. I was off. I blame my ear. I am still hurting. Hopefully it will be gone soon.

Have solid work on the books. 4 weeks of private training. Good but bad. It's for a client I hate and will be from 12-8pm. Motherfucker. End of this month, one week in Oct, two in Nov. Bullshit. But whatever. It's work.

Off to the grocery store. Then therapy.

Y13 D113

 Not feeling good today. My ear still hurts and now I have some stomach issues. General queasiness. Nothing specific. Not sure if I need to poop or puke kind of feeling. Bleh.

Taught a class yesterday! YAY! B is on the mend. How do I know? Because they are "bored". Good. Be bored. Learn to amuse yourself. Hilton extended my status through march of 2023. Makes me happy. Finished off some of the leftovers from the week. It's almost been one week since surgery. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit like a banana.

Y13 D112

Still can't hear out of my right stupid ear. Been putting drops in but not working. I hate ear infections.

We had an incident yesterday. B went to the bathroom, got dizzy, fell down, passed out, then tried to make it back to bed alone, passed out again, and smacked her chin and knee. Got some nice bruises let me tell you. I heard a thud downstairs while I was working and LEPT up the stairs to find her on the floor. We called the doctor, iced everything, taped her knee, but yeah, gonna be some bruising. I was worried more about concussion. Other than that, everything is going swell. I want to kill the cats. They are being so damn needy again. 

Finally have a class today. Also looks like October will be pretty busy. Getting booked out for multiple things. That's good. 

Y13 D111

I fucked up last night. I broke a sink. The faucet in the laundry has pissed me off since we bought this house. It "chunks" when you turn on the cold water and freezes up. Well I wasn't in the mood last night and smacked it when it did that and the whole top part broke off. Now tonight I get to replace a faucet. I didn't feel like doing it at 9:30 last night. 

That is about the only thing I need to report for today. My ear infection is worse and I can't hear a fucking thing out of my right ear. Joy. 

Y13 D110

First full day at home. Some ups, some downs. Biggest down? We lost one of the axies last night. B was on so many drugs though that it didn't really sink in. We lost Nugget, the deformed little rescue. She tried her best that one, but I think in the end her body just gave out. She was a little trooper and shall be missed. I am waiting for the shoe to drop in B's head though. That's not going to be pretty.

Mostly B stayed in bed while I did things for her. This is the way. We did have two friends come over to socialize for a little while. I made lasagne. I had them gone by 8pm though. 2 hours is the max time anyone gets to spend.

Other things done - grocery store for more stuff, bed bath and beyond for a body pillow for B, light house cleaning, feeds, and touched up my hair. That last one messed me up. I now have water on my right ear and can't hear shit. Driving me nuts. I know it will pop at some point too which will be even more painful. I was supposed to have two amazon deliveries but for the second time in a week they're late. Let's see if they show up today. Fuckers.

Got a class this week. Plus doc writing. Speaking of docs, have my first therapy appointment on Friday. Joy.

Y13 D109

First day back at home. So far so good. I got up yesterday went to one grocery store, then waited for a second to open. While waiting B messaged me and said the doctor had come by and she was free to go anytime. Nice. Originally they told me noon-ish, and now it was only 7:30am. I got a bunch of ready made stuff from the store - soup, pop in the oven fresh pizzas, etc. I have a menu planned for the week but I also wanted to have stuff B can make quickly for med taking. Finished shopping at 8:14, dropped everything off, and was at the hospital by 9. We got her all squared away, brought down to car, then I waited at the pharmacy for all the pills coming home with us. Many pills. We were home before 11 which is great because I originally hadn't planned on leaving until 10:30. The rest of the day was mostly making sure she was comfortable. She slept a little but not as much as I would have liked. But all in all, things went well. I slept in the guest room last night to give her enough space, and she is getting up more frequently than me to take meds. Constant alarms would drive me nuts.

Before I go, I want to thank each and every one of you who sent something so far. You've really made B feel loved and special. Here's what things look like right now:

As you can see, she's received a ton of loving. Her dad finally stopped by last night with the bouquet on the far right, but nothing, not even a text, from her mother. Heck, one of those is from my company as a whole. Even more than her own mother. What a piece of work. In addition to all of the above, my sister sent a lovely care package of clothes and a puzzle to keep B occupied. She loved it. 

I am going to stick around the house today, play some video games but stay as close as possible. 

Y13 D108

 "She's alive! SHE'S ALIVE!" BWAHAHAHAHA

B has made it through surgery people. What a long fucking day it was. We left the house at 9:20. Arrived at 9:40. First went to the wrong building. Fun. Made B cranky because we walked to the other. Now remember, they haven't had anything to eat since 7pm Thursday. We're already 12 hours into hangry my good friends. And the lord knows, we don't ever want to make this woman hangry. Finally get where we need to be at 10 and they immediately take her back for prep. That's the last I see of her until 6pm. 8 hours of sitting and waiting. I did go to the cafeteria around 11 for a sandwich but otherwise, I found a little corner, setup my laptop, and just did some work to distract me. Shitty internet at the hotel, but enough I could distract with work and other crap. She was done with surgery around 3 and the doc came and walked me through everything. Hey guess what? In addition to all the other shit wrong with her, they also found ovarian endometriosis. Even more reason why that shit needed to come out.

Once in a room, I made sure first and foremost she got food. I know the priorities. All the anesthesia had long worn off and she was hungry. Got food sent up (grilled chicken Caesar salad, mashed potato and gravy, broccoli, rice kripsie treat). Priorities. She has two tiny little incisions (5mm) on either side and one the doctor managed to hide in the belly button. This guy is good. I seriously wish he could be my doctor. They were giving her some pain meds as I was rolling out at 7:45. Got home a little after 8, more cards in the mail, thank you all. Fed cats, made me food, went to bed. 

Heading back this morning around 11 to pick her up. But first I am going to the grocery store to get some easy to eat stuff for the week - soups and pre-packaged good stuff from the fancy store. I want there to be a variety available. I also need to change the sheets and keep the cats out of the bedroom. Hence my being back up so early.

Oh and don't forget to be solemn today to mark that 20 years ago a bunch of people died by being killed by another bunch of people and the other people we attacked pretending it was the bad people but it really wasn't. Mission Accomplished!

Y13 D107

Today's the day people. I am up early to make sure everything runs smooth this morning. B has to be up at 8, we leave here at 9. Check-in at 10, surgery scheduled for noon. Should be out of surgery by 2 or 3 at the latest, recovery, and then I will see her again. I am assuming around 4. So yeah, long day ahead of me. And not just me obviously. Long day for both of us. Scary day too. Then I will pick her up Saturday time unknown. All depends on recovery. I will probably get there at 8am and just sit. It's what I do. Tonight I have to prep the house and more tomorrow morning. Sheet changes, keep cats out, make sure she has everything within reach, etc. I will be up early tomorrow too.

To everyone who has already started sending stuff and it arrived yesterday - THANK YOU! From the bottom of my heart, thank you. B cried multiple times yesterday from knowing people cared about her. She got multiple flower arrangement, cookies, and cards. Not a single fucking thing from her family mind you. She got a text from her mother on Tuesday - "you still having that surgery?". B's reply was "Yes" to which she got a "good luck". Wow. Nothing from her dad. Who by the way in case I forgot to mention is about to have another failed marriage. Apparently on Tuesday his wife had enough and left to stay with her son. Good job. But anyway, getting things from people really touched her to her core. For those of you who have stuff on the way, thank you in advance. It will mean the world for sure. I expect to come home from the hospital to more cards at the very least. It all has meaning.

As for me, yesterday I worked on a class most of the day. B wanted Taco Bell as a "last meal" and I obliged. Her words, not mine. She meant it more in a I can't eat after 8pm way, but still. 

Okay. Here we go...

Y13 D106

 Had a bit of a stress yesterday. The kid sent B a squishable to take with her to the hospital and when I messaged the kid to say thank you, I got no response. No biggie since it was a little after 9am her time and figured she was working. But then later, still no response. Now they still have fires near them. So much stressing and calling with no answer until I finally reached out to bf. He confirmed they were okay but still no response from kid. Turns out something screwy happened with her phone and she had been not sending messages since monday to anyone. Quick reboot and oh look, many replies. Didn't need that stress. But in the end all is good.

Had a meeting with a new employee yesterday. They were hired by the VP on the consulting side to basically be a recruiter to match consultants with projects. Yeah, it was a 5 minute conversation. She's explaining all this "and I want to touch base with people to make sure they have enough hours, need more, blah blah blah." I said that's great, but I'm not a consultant. I am an FTE who does training related stuff only. No consulting projects. "Oh. So we will probably never talk?" Exactly. Bye bye. Easiest work call ever. She sounded annoyed but sorry if you weren't told not everyone is a consultant by your boss. Just going down the employee list is a useless thing. She also started talking about how she wants to organize some virtual stuff and I'm like that's nice, I will never attend because of time difference, schedule issues, and the simple fact I won't do video. "Oh." Yep. Shot down again. Bye bye for real this time.

I also worked on the new class. Getting stumped on a bit of code I hope to figure out today. Trying to get some R code working and its a matter of figuring out the right packages. Stupid R.

B left around 1. Got to the hotel around 5. Sent multiple pictures from the concert. They got back to the hotel around midnight and should be home midday today. Sounds like they had a good time. I am very happy about that. B deserved a mental break from things. Tomorrow is the big day and will be full of anxiety. Fun.

Y13 D105

 In the past 12 hours we've had a severe thunderstorm warning followed by severe wind warning. Fun. Better than severe heat or fire I guess? I mean one way or another mother nature and the earth are trying to eradicate this virus known as humans. Can't say as I blame them.

Worked on a new class. Took a break to go to my hair people for a check in. Worked some more. Made a roast for dinner. We are 2 days from B's surgery people. Two days. Tonight she is going to Ohio for Alanis. When she gets back there will ne less than 24 hours until surgery. Prepare for a hectic few days. 

In other news, will TX just secede? Just go away. Or will all the stupid old white men just die off? One or the other please. Getting sick of both of those things. 

I finally was able to make an appointment with a therapist. Have my first session on the 17th. Overdue for sure. Maybe I will finally work through all this anger, depression, and feelings of being overwhelmed by the world.

Maybe.

Y13 D104

 Yesterday was pretty good until the evening. The reality of surgery hit B hard around 6pm and they just had a massive panic attack. Every worse case scenario started going through her head. We discussed what to do in each case, but it was still a rough thing to talk about. Emotionally exhausting conversation. We are three days away.

For the most part I didn't do much of anything. I enjoyed my holiday. Video games. Some tv. Went into the backyard for some outdoor time. Started a roast for tonight. We had mushroom soup over chicken and rice for dinner. Except for the talk about death and comas, a relatively peaceful day.

And now back to our regularly scheduled whoop dee doo. 

Y13 D103

 WOOO! BIG SLEEP!! 9 hours baby!! Some much needed sleep. I feel refreshed for once. 

We worked our butts off yesterday. We had a house cleaning checklist, we each took different rooms and tasks and while it took us a good four hours, we have this house immaculate. One less stressor for B this week. Now we just have to keep it clean. That's always the hard part, right?

I made mushroom soup for dinner and the week. Had a friend over as they wanted to watch a special with B. So they setup in the basement watching the Billie Eilish concert while I played video games. Then we socialized to a little after 10, and went to bed.

A good day to be sure. Four days until surgery people. Four days.

Y13 D102

LONG day yesterday. Was up at 2:15am and didn't go to bed until 10:30pm with no rest in between. But before we talk about my day, let's talk about Texas. In other words:

WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU FUCKING PEOPLE??

Oh and I am not talking about the draconian bullshit abortion laws. Oh no, they've gone even further. There is literally a group of WHITE MEN aka Republicans who want, ready for this? A DRESS CODE FOR WOMEN. Yep. No jeans. No skirts above the knee. Pants must be slacks with cuffs. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?? These people need to be taken out in a field somewhere. That's not even the worst of it. They have SUCCESSFULLY passed a whole slew of bills that stop teachers from teaching things, that stop police departments from defunding, and much more. Seriously. This needs to stop. That state needs to go. I will refuse to go to Texas in the future.

On a more personal note, I left the hotel around 4, drove to the grocery store directly from the hotel, did my shopping, came home, put everything away, did laundry, etc etc. For dinner we did steak fajitas. Quite tasty. We had some us time, hung outside for a while, played some games, went to bed.

Today is housecleaning day. We want the house to be as clean as possible before Friday. This way B can go have surgery with one thing off her mind. We have a list and we will knock it out. Woo Sunday Funday. 

Y13 D101

I had one of the best days I've had in a long time yesterday. I felt normal and whole almost all day. I walked over 2.5 miles total. I was outside for almost the entire day. I interacted socially with a number of people. It was just good.

I started my day by going to Bob Evans for breakfast. This hotel still isn't doing full breakfast service so I said fuck it and treated myself. That set the tone for the day. I had blueberry pancakes with a couple of eggs and fruit. 

Next stop was the zoo. When I got to the zoo there were like five cars in the parking lot. When the gates opened at 9, it was me and one older gentleman. Him and I had been chit chatting in line. Turns out he was a former employee and decided I was his guest for the day. Free zoo admission? Heck yes! Nice little zoo. Not too big, but big enough that I got a good walk in. Saw lots of animals, took over 300 pictures. I brought my big camera on this trip and am glad I did. 

After the zoo I drove a couple towns over to the largest rock shop EVER. Four buildings full of ROCKS. I spent way too much but don't care. Worth every penny. Had Culver's for lunch. Then I stopped at a HUGE donut shop and got a dozen donuts. Headed back to the hotel, took a nap, then headed out to Turkeyville. Yep. Turkeyville. A turkey farm about 20 minutes away from the hotel. I had a full turkey dinner, got to meet some turkeys, picked up some random stuff from their gift shop. Very enjoyable.

Back in the room around 6. Relaxed, went to bed at 8. Now I am heading to the grocery store on my way home. Will get home, do laundry, and clean the house. We are six days from B's surgery. This next week is going to be very interesting.

Y13 D100

 Ah hotel life. I missed you. I know to most that sounds weird but there's just something comforting to me about being in a hotel. Bed to yourself. Knowing someone else is going to make the bed. Empty the trash. Clean the floor. Not tht I am out here intentionally making a mess mind you. Just nice to know that I don't have to do everything. 

I headed out around 12:30 yesterday, Arrived around 2:30. This is just far enough away that I don't feel stressed and I know I could get home quickly in an emergency. But at the same time, it's not the same four walls. I did some exploring yesterday. Saw the Kellog's world headquarters. I got into a small accident downtown unfortunately. I waqs parallel parked and didn't see the car behind me when I pulled out. My trailer hitch scratched their bumper. To be fair, if they hadn't been in the vehicle I probably wouldn't have stopped. The scratch is so small that I didn't even see it until they pointed it out. Whatever. Shit happens. They can hit my insurance if they want. I would do the same. It's not like I would have hit and run mind you, I just literally couldn't see the scratch without getting down on the ground and looking directly at it. The only reason they were freaking out is they were planning on turning it in to a dealer this weekend. Okay. Fair. We will see what comes of it.

Went to a Louisiana seafood place for dinner. Fried food hell (heaven?). Had alligator tail, catfish, crawfish, and gulf shrimp combo. Dear lord it was too much food. Went back to hotel and just chilled in my room for the night.

Today I am off to a rock shop, the zoo, and a place that sells everything turkey. Yep. Midwest baby for the, well, I don't know if "win" is the right word. Midwest for the something.

Y13 D99

WOW! I really slept in today. It's after 7am. I went to bed around 11 so that's some pretty good sleep for me! I should also mention that with extra sleep it helps my tinnitus. I haven't had a major bout in days. That's a nice change of pace for sure.

Worked on a new doc. Got the foundation done. Made japanese curry for dinner. Basically stew but with a curry package added. It was okay. B likes it a lot so there's that. 

I had something to say but I forgot. Story of my life. Oh well. Spending the next two days (mostly) in Battle Creek. I need out of this house. Leaving here around noon. We shall see how this goes. We are one week away from B's surgery. 

EDIT - I remembered! We finally made a decision on B's birthday next year. I know that sounds crazy but it's only 5 months away and it's a big birthday for her. After all the trauma of the last two years, her surgery, and life in general, we want to do something meaningful. Originally (akak pre-pandemic) we were going to take a trip to Scotland and do the castles. Now the thought of getting on a plan and even the chances of getting to the UK are gone. Instead we're taking a road trip.

We are going to drive south. We will first stop at the Cincinnati Zoo, then head to TN to spend two or three days at DOLLYWOOD! Then from there drive to Chattanooga for a couple of days, come back home through Nashville and Lexington. Take a week or so and see the south. She is 100% down for this. Now even I am excited.

Okay, that's it. Back to your regularly schedule bullshit.

Y13 D98

Add another game to my list of completed. I finished Control Ultimate Edition finally. Got through the remaining DLC I had still. Got like 75% of the full achievement list. I will take that. Yep. My big accomplishments.

Now, the kid on the other hand did do something worth mentioning. She has paid off her student loans! She has been riding interest free for a while but that ends at the end of September. She decided screw it, I am not paying anyone interest on this and paid off the balance in full. Plus she still had enough leftover from her savings after doing it to put a good chunk into her IRA. Well done kiddo! Very proud of her. I sent her a congratulatory gift. I was planning on getting her some new pots and pans for christmas but expedited that gift to now. She may be smart in some ways, but in others, not so much. They have been living off like one scratched up pot and a beat up pan for all their cooking. Nope. Now they will have a nice 12 piece set of ceramic cookware. If you're going to adult, adult all the way.

I completed recording a new class yesterday. Cranked through it and got it completely done in one day. One less thing I have to worry about. Now I am starting a new one. Whee. Had leftovers for dinner last night. Need to figure out what I want to do tonight. My big decision of the day.