Nothing like waking up in the morning and sending out 2600 in bills. Whee. But everything is paid except for my car reg which is going to have to wait. It's due at the end of the month so I will deal with it then. It's only the 12th. It is the 12th right? Yep it is. Okay.
Yesterday was shitty for me. Mostly because I was sick. I was also pissed as hell at my client. I drove all the way out there at 6:30 in the morning for one guy to show up at 9, then to tell me oh yeah the two people we need are out today. Fuck me. I was there for like 40 minutes and didn't get back home until 11. Fucking sucked. Especially since I felt like death.
Got home with soup and then did laundry. I got all the laundry done miraculously even though I almost passed out at one point. Once the laundry was done I did in fact pass out for an hour. Unfortunately that's when the kid got home and woke me up. Ugh. I stayed up and had soup and juice and watched x-files with her before she had to go off to work. Then I went back to bed. At 9. Go grampa go.
Speaking of grampas, my dad sent me something yesterday that really pissed me off. An email saying 'Why Californians are Confused'. It was a picture of three people, a police chief, a police officer, and someone who works on the police commission. Apparently all of California is confused because two of these people are trans and one is a lesbian. Yes, that's the whole issue right there, because I know in your state father there are no gay, lesbian, or tg persons. Nope, just a whole state of happy gender perfect heterosexuals. Yep. And if there were any lgbt in your state well gosh no would you let them hold jobs. Oh no, you would put them in the salt mines where they belong gosh golly. Fucking moron. This was especially poignant since yesterday was national coming out day. How would he have felt if I had simply replied back - You know, I am TG. Would he have stopped talking to me? Or am I just confused? Do I need Jesus?
And yes, there, I said it out loud in this blog for the first time in four years. I am TG. Although I dislike that term because it is too vague. I prefer the term 'dual gendered' which is a newer term and is more descriptive of what I am. See I don't suffer from gender dysphoria. I have no issues with my physical gender nor do I have any interest in changing it. I am definitely heterosexual as well. Hey, you've been reading me for four years, you know how I am on that front.
But at the end of the day, I do enjoy and like things that are identified with a different physical gender. I like clothing, fashion, makeup, jewelry, shopping, etc. All those things normally associated with the female gender. Therefore in order to make society happy, if I wish to enjoy my love for those things, I must change my full outward appearance to adapt. It's quite annoying actually. If a woman wants to cut her hair short, not wear makeup, and wear tennis shoes, no one automatically assumes she is a man or thinks she is gay. If however, I want to wear a pair of heels or put on makeup. I must be gay. Unless I fully change my appearance to be that of a woman. Then I get all sorts of other shit for it and I still get assumed to be gay. My gender and my sexuality are not the same. Nor should they be. As one meme puts it, some girls have penises, deal with it. Also I am not a drag queen. That is another big misunderstanding about things. Drag queens ARE typically gay men who are either doing a parody of the female form by being over the top or an homage if you will to female celebrities, etc. Drag queens ARE over the top. They do it for show not because they have a genuine interest in the things they are wearing/doing - usually. There are those who are TG and use being a female impersonator as a means of expression. These are usually not gay either. Also these can be persons who do suffer from dysphoria and have a longer plan to undergo FFS and SRS. Neither of which interest me. No my thing is more mental than physical.
After writing all that. If I have somehow 'changed' in your mind and you don't want to read any more, bye. For the rest of you, I am still me. Nothing has changed. If you have any questions, well you know how to reach me.
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