ANA Y1 D277

We fucked so hard last night we moved the bed a foot across the room. No, seriously. I know that's a wtf way to start today's post but welcome to it. We turned on the big light afterwards and realized the bed was moved a good 18 inches over. I mean, wow. We were going at it clearly. Which of course ups our numbers for the year. This is just insane. Six months in and I am still as giddy as that first weekend. Even my therapist is impressed. Especially since 18 months ago I came to her saying how I didn't feel like I wanted physical intimacy. Hmm. Yeah. They closed on their house yesterday. No wait. Correction. THEIR GF closed on HER new house yesterday. Fine line distinction. Just saying. I worked on a presentation. Then took the cat to the vet. Pulling a tooth on friday. Gave her antibiotics for an infection. Fun times. We're hoping the tooth will fix some of the issues but we're not sure if that's the only problem. So there's that. Made Brazilian fish stew for dinner with mahi and black tiger shrimp last night. Fucking really good. Had a bumpy cake for dessert. Went grocery shopping around 8pm. Watched a little tv, then see above. Crashed around midnight. A very full Monday to be sure.

ANA Y1 D276

It is time for another week. Finally Feb will be over. How is it the shortest month always feels the longest? It truly does. Feb is one of those months that just never seems to end. It will be behind us in a couple of days thankfully. One step closer to summer. One step closer to 2024. Wow.

Had a good day. Reduced down the number of legs. B finally got their power back on yesterday morning. They came over to get the dog and cat. While they were here we discussed their furniture in the basement. Once I explained what they were asking of me, they saw it from my perspective and agreed to take it all when they take everything else. The conversation went well, I held my ground and was firm but polite, and when we talked it out loud they immediately saw what they were asking of me. It went much better than I could have hoped. Score. They close today on the house which means that starting next weekend, stuff will go. Over the next couple of weeks I will get my space back. Then I can see about dry walling down there, make a new bedroom, and discuss with the bank a HELOC to let me build a bathroom. Add an egress window and boom, 2500 sq. ft. home. Double my property value. This is the goal for 2023. I do all this, and gee, maybe I don't need to move.

We had a pretty quiet day overall. We went to the park for some outside time. Played some pokemon. Then we went to home depot to look at paint colors. We have decided on some new colors for the house which will also help. After, we went to total wine, then to on the border for dinner. Came home, had intense sex, watched some tv, went to bed. Running a 37% for the year babies. You figure it out. Amazing how things have changed for me. I think about my journey on this planet and I get very grateful when I "move forward" in an aspect of my life. Some things I have fallen back, some things I am standing still, but in general I feel I am making progress towards truly being my best self and living the best life I can. All I can ask for.

Quiet work week. Presentation creation galore. Have to take Marble to the vet today. Not looking forward to that.

ANA Y1 D275

Yesterday just kind of kicked my ass. I don't know how else to put it. Too many damn legs in this house right now. B's power came back sometime in the night (it was out as of about 8pm last night still, but is on as of 6:30am this morning) so come get some of these legs please. I spent yesterday morning once again cleaning up pee and poo from a floor. It feels like it's all I do some days. It didn't help that out of nowhere we got 2-3 inches of snow dumped on us. Seriously? Like it goes from clear to dump in 12 hours. Fuck this. But it disrupted all of our morning plans which sucked. We did go out later in the day once it melted off. We went to the Asian store with our friend, then came home and made sesame chicken and crab rangoon in the deep fryer. The fryer worked great. Was very happy. Got some batter to make tempura too. We watched M3GAN after and went to bed. No real plans for today. Got some stomach rumblings going on so cutting this short.

ANA Y1 D274

What in the ever living fuck?? I went to bed around midnight and yeah, it was cold out, but clear skies. Um, there's now like 2 inches of snow. In six hours.  What the heck?? I have things to do today! I have stuff being delivered! It's like cocaine bear exploded in my yard!! Ugh. Stupid weather is stupid.

Speaking of Cocaine Bear, god that movie was awful. It has a few laughs and surprisingly more story than I expected, but holy crap, it's dumb. I mean really dumb. So dumb, but yeah, I enjoyed it. Mostly I enjoyed going out and having a wonderful date night with my woman and friend. Nice reclining seats, heated even, delivered food, no one in front of me, clean theater. The only drawback was the people talking around me, but meh, I still had fun. Actually I had a pretty good day overall.

First off, I had therapy at 7:30 and I went into it stressed out. I woke up to the smell of pee in the closet. Once again the cat peed. There was a huge puddle of pee and shit in the corner of the closet and all over my shoes. Like $300 worth of shoes destroyed. I am not happy. Doesn't help there's an extra cat and dog here. 20 legs running around. It's insane. Add the axies and you got 28 legs I am taking care of right now. It's a lot of stress. Hopefully two of them will go today. Talked through some things in therapy. Worked on setting some boundaries with B which is going to be a rough conversation when I see them, but an important one for me to have. It has to do with the furniture in the basement. I shouldn't be a storage unit for stuff they want to sell. I'm not going to deal with strangers and possible damage to my house when I am not getting any piece of the action. Unless they plan on giving me a good portion of the money, I want them to take the stuff with all their other stuff. Like I said though, this is going to be a delicate conversation.

After therapy I did a mentoring session. That went well. We did a few hours. From there I had a company meeting where they officially announced my transition. Nerve wracking but exciting. I received a lot of positive feedback from people. It was nice. I sent a follow up email with pics to the company and got nothing but great responses. After that it was movie time!

When we got home from the movie we weren't quite done and ended up watching an episode of LoU. Damn that's a good show. We cuddled on the couch and enjoyed the Frank and Bill episode. So good. After that, the bed time. Today we're supposed to go to the asian market with our friend and do sesame chicken and crab rangoon tonight. Our new fryer came yesterday and I am itching to try it out. Really nice capacity. I feel it's going to get a lot of use. Going to rearrange the kitchen today to accommodate.

Okay, be safe out there. It's the end of the world as we know it, but me baby? I feel fine.

ANA Y1 D273

I got only 4.5 hours sleep last night. I have t be up for a 7:30 therapy session followed by a 9am class followed by a 3pm meeting. It's going to be a busy day which is only made worse by the fact that I currently have 4 cats and a dog in my house. Add to that an annoyed girlfriend. B lost power yesterday like thousands around here and they had to leave their house. It was in the 50s at their place with no way to heat it. Stupid houses with no fireplaces. They slept at B's dads last night. But they couldn't take the dog or the cat with them. Instead they dropped them on my doorstep. How am I supposed to say no? They are technically still my responsibility. But C doesn't like that B can ask for favors and I jump. Flashbacks to when X2 would get upset for me jumping whenever X1 wanted something. I get it. C also knows that this is not a long term situation. Once papers are signed, I can increase my distance. I can respond to messages slower. I can say no. Until then I feel my hands are tied. They close Monday on the new house. One step forward. I just need time.

ANA Y1 D272

We're going on a road trip. We have decided to take the first two weeks of May and drive across country. We're going to visit my sister and nieces, then head to Reno just because, and finally spend some time in A with the kid and friends. What a way to cap off this first year of insanity, eh? We're just in the planning phase right now, but we're looking at first stop Des Moines, then Cheyenne, then Boise, followed by Reno, and lastly Chico. 2000 miles. We can go at our own pace, stay a day or so if we want, and switch off driving. Look at America, here we come.

Worked on multiple things yesterday then did a 2 hour webinar. It was a decent day. Made lamb for dinner, played some video games, and went to bed. Nothing exciting. Today will be similar. We were pretty much trapped inside yesterday because of the ice storm. Couple of inches of pure ice outside right now. It's insane for anyone driving. Siren after siren was heard last night. Today shouldn't be as bad, but it's still not safe out there. We're staying inside just to make sure we don't slide down the street. I am tired of this weather which is also what prompted our road trip. I want C to see my ocean. I need to see my ocean. I need to remember what real weather feels like. 

ANA Y1 D271

I did it!! I got a 100% sleep score for the very first time! I slept incredibly well last night. The temperature was good. My pillow was good. The planets all aligned for once and I got almost 8 hours of sleep. Holy cow!! I don't remember my dreams but they must not have been horrible if I slept so soundly. I'll take it thank you very much.

Got up yesterday, took the truck in for 2 year service. Was back home by 10am. Worked on a new custom class for Wells Fargo to be taught in March. Then I worked on renewing my certifications in a product. Have to do more of that today. For dinner we had tacos. We watched one of my favorite movies last night, Willy Wonka. C was sleepy and we went to bed right at 10. It wasn't any kind of crazy or stand out day, but it wasn't bad either. Just a day. We're in the middle of an ice storm warning until 4am tomorrow which should be interesting. Otherwise, things are okay. B closes on the new house in one week. That means sometime in the next couple weeks I should get my basement back. What a difference that will make. I am very excited about that. I have a webinar today which should be fun. All in all, I'm doing okay.

ANA Y1 D270

I am up very early this morning as I have to take the truck in for service. I have a 7:30 appointment. Got to get it done and out of the way for the day. I am as a result, very sleepy. 

First part of the day was spent at voice therapy. Came back, did some work, then had a 2pm appointment with my primary doctor. I am planning the first of what may be many surgeries and needed a referral. I will be calling that office today to setup a consult. More on when I have that scheduled and it's moving forward. After some more work, somehow we ended up having some afternoon delight. Oops. After all that, C and I tried our hand at making homemade crab rangoon. They came out awesome! I was so proud of us. We had them with leftovers. We watched a couple of episodes of Last of Us. Not bad. We headed off to bed around 10:30 happy.

That's all. Meetings today after truck. Teach two days this week.

ANA Y1 D269

It's another week. Woo. Tired this morning. When am I not? Some day I will catch up on all my sleep. Some day.

Had a good day. We baked in the morning. Hung around the house. Around 3 we went over to our friend's for a homemade pizza party. Hence the baking. I made lemon bars and brownies. The pizza was really good. They are learning how to make Detroit style pizza and it came out good. We were there until about 7. Got home, watched some tv and went to bed.

Last voice appointment today. Then a doc appointment at 2pm. 

ANA Y1 D268

The one fucking day I could sleep in, the one day I could get up without an alarm, I am greeted at 6:12am with a goddamn cat puking on the bed. Seriously people? I didn't go to bed until almost 1am because I knew I didn't have to get up but nope. Cat puke. Of course I am wide awake after that. Fuck me.

Had a productive day yesterday. We spent the first half cleaning the fuck out of this house. Spring cleaning a little early. Deep cleaned the floors. Wiped down walls. Did windows. This house is spotless right now thank you. Felt very accomplished. I started the day by getting ribs in. I was up at 5, put in the ribs and went back to bed until 9. We got up together and cleaned until 1pm. Then we went to my favorite antique store where we found C a vintage leather jacket, a pineapple tea set, and a marble lion to go on the dresser. Tres chic. A very nice haul. We had ice cream as it had warmed up slightly. To a whopping 50 people. Break out the shorts! We got back home and as I was serving dinner, shit went sideways. Remember how I said the only time we have problems is other people? Well, right as I was serving dinner, C got into it with her mom about taking care of the dad in two weeks. I was like wtf?? Where is your sister? When is she going to fucking step up and take over her responsibility?? It started a whole thing between us and neither of us felt like eating. We talked it through and decided to go out to help put the incident behind us. We went over to Marvin's, the arcade. We were there until almost 10 blowing off steam. We hit two jackpots on games and won 1200 tickets. We were both starving and grabbed Wendy's on the way home. We talked more about things while we ate and finished the night in a good place. Went to bed around 1.

This morning we're going to bake as we're going to a friend's in the late afternoon for a pizza party. They're learning how to make "Detroit style" pizza and invited a few of us over to sample. Okay. But that's not until 3pm, so we're taking the morning slow. Hopefully there won't be any more cat puke.

ANA Y1 D267

Been up for a while and had less than 5 hours of sleep on top of that. I got up early to start 12 hour rib for dinner tonight. I should have gone back to bed, but I started in on today's major task - cleaning this house. Things are just messy right now and it's affecting my mood. While waiting for the water to come up to temp I started cleaning the kitchen and found just some gross stuff on handles, the counter, etc. It's not that we're living in filth, it's just little things like a sticky counter. I don't blame anyone for it either. It just builds up because we don't see it until it's too late. With me teaching all week and C focused on classes, it gets hard. But today is the day we clean. 

Yesterday I was annoyed most of the day because of B. $1300 was the final total of what I sent out for her. Seriously. You know they sometimes throw out how they could push for alimony and yet the funny thing is, I could probably get a court on my side and she would get LESS than what I am currently handling. Just saying. Taught all day. 8am until 4pm. It was a long day. For dinner we had poke poke. VERY good. Another one of those how have I lived here for 4 years and never eaten here things. Oh wait, because it's all raw fish and well, we know how someone felt about fish, don't we? We watched the finale of top chef season 4, started messing around on the couch, moved to the bedroom, and fell asleep intertwined at 9:30. I woke back up at 11, got up, prepped my ribs for this morning, putzed around, and went back to bed around 12:30. Tossed and turned a bit. Got out of bed at 5. For the record, we're running a 50% ratio for the month and we're 1/3 of the way to "the average person" in terms of number of times they have sex per year. Just saying. Make me smile just typing that.

The new wine fridge arrived yesterday. Had a fucking dent in it. Managed to get Home Depot to give me 10% back on the purchase price. It's not much, but it's something. The dent is on the back so no one sees it, but I know it's there. While at home depot we got a new garbage can. We both hated the plastic one we had and we replaced it with a nice metal one with an auto lid. So far we like it a lot better. Moved all the wines into the new fridge. 22 reds, 11 whites. I am running low. The top with the whites is set to 45 degrees, the bottom red section, 55. I like having a dual zone with precise temps instead of a dial. I have room for about 10 more bottles. May have to tap into one of our clients and see about getting a case sent over. 

Other than cleaning, no real plans for today. Thank goodness.

ANA Y1 D266

I fucking hate Feb. The short month and the way the bills all fall kills me. I know if I go back and read every other mid-Feb post I will have said the same thing. It's even worse right now because I am basically paying for two households. I just sent out $1000 that I shouldn't be paying. It's just fucked up. Add in all their useless shit, it's two grand a month that I need to stop paying. That would change many things for me. They need to get a fucking job. Very annoyed right now.

Taught all day. Had all the leftovers for dinner. Watched tv, played video games, went to bed. Nothing exciting. Same shit today realistically. 

ANA Y1 D265

100 days to go and this first year of my new adventure will be over. Wow.

We had an unexpected "nice" day yesterday. I say it that way because nice is relative, right? It was mid-50s which given how it's been was pleasant. We took advantage of it and went to the nature park near us in the late afternoon and had a nice walk. Walked a couple miles in total. It felt good to be outside and moving around. We need to do more of that this year. Unfortunately, it's scheduled to snow from 9am today until 3am tomorrow so yeah. One faux spring day is all we get. The rest of the day was spent doing marketing work. It is what it is. Made seafood pasta for dinner with clams, mussels, shrimp, and scallops. Very good. We watched some tv and somehow ended up having sex again. Oops. Multiple nights in a row. Scandalous. Crashed out around 10:30.

Today and tomorrow are teaching days. My day is blocked and that's good. No one to bug me about anything else. Leftovers tonight. Need to relax after dinner. Maybe play some video games tonight.

ANA Y1 D264

I had the greatest valentine's day of my entire life yesterday. No joke, no hyperbole. It was absolutely incredible from start to finish. First off, I was *asked* to be C's valentine. No one has ever actually asked me before. Silly little thing isn't it? But that was the first moment where I realized this was about to be something very different. We exchanged cards and gifts before I started class. In addition to the skateboards we got each other, I got her a giant snack box. She got me new shoes. Adidas Ultraboost 5.0 something something. Apparently these are the gods gift to our feet. I posted a pic on Insta and my friend who lives in NY and walks everyone said "it's like walking on clouds". Okay. I accept your cloud shoes. What a wonderful and specifically personal gift. I was touched. I then taught until 4:30. Our heart shaped pizza arrived at 5:30 on the dot. We ate and watched top chef. After that we went off to the bedroom for over an hour. Literally the best sex I have ever had in my life. I have no other words. It was just beyond the realm of human language. Noises that have never escaped me were heard last night. Mind boggling. We both were just spent. But that didn't stop us from going to Dairy Queen and buying an ice cream cake at 9pm. Yeah. We got a heart shaped cake and proceeded to destroy that bitch. It was heavenly. We crawled into bed around 10:30 and just basked in the perfection of the day. May I be blessed with a thousand more just like this.

Today is marketing type stuff. Have a furnace inspection happening. Need to recuperate from yesterday.

ANA Y1 D263

HAPPY VD! Boy am I in a much different place this year than last. I'm looking forward to today. I was asked to be someone's valentine which to be honest was an absolute first for me. Yay me. I'm having a little trouble this morning typing. New nails. I LOVE them. But yeah, taking some getting used to for sure.

Yesterday was a pain filled day for both of us. My back is calming down a bit but it still hurts. C is better but still in some pain. We're old. Leave us be.

From 4-9 there was but one focus yesterday. Me. Hair and nails followed by dinner with our stylist. Here's the end result:

VERY happy. I teach today from 8:30 - 4:30 and then let's say we are gonna have some valentine's fun. May your day be as blessed as mine.

ANA Y1 D262

I am in pain this morning. Technically I have been in pain since about 2pm yesterday. We went skateboarding yesterday since the weather was beautiful. Yes, I hurt myself. I know. Just don't. I know. I came down a ramp and landed square on my back. I have a thermacare pad on it right now. It fucking hurts. No amount of pads would have helped either. I went up in the air and landed smack on my back in a half pipe. I'm paying for my hubris. No one must know how much pain I am in otherwise I am going to get too many "I told you" so. Nope. I will suffer in silence with the occasional scream thank you very much. C is in pain too. She fell a few times. We are both a mess. But you know what? We had the time of our life. So yeah, it was totally worth it.

We got up yesterday, had breakfast, packed our stuff, and headed home around 9. Got home a little before 11. Unpacked and went to the skatepark. We were there for about an hour until 2 boys came and made us look and feel inferior. Stupid boys. We came home, watched some tv, C took a nap, I worked on getting my hair ready for tonight. B came over to get a couple of things. They confirmed they will be closing on their house March 1st. That makes me happy. A date in time that I can focus on. A date when I will have my basement back. Now to just get them to stop spending my fucking money. Ha. One baby step at a time I guess.

We had a nice roast for dinner, took a shower together, had the most hilarious and scream filled attempt at sex. Neither of us could get into a good position without pain. But we laughed the whole time we were screaming. We amused each other. We gave up and went to bed around 10. It was a rough night. 

Today is new hair day!! I went FOUR months with my last piece which makes me very happy. If I can do the same thing this time I will go until June. That's how this shit is supposed to work. Pics tomorrow. Also getting my nails done so I am very excited. This will be a fun night as long as I can sit in the chair.

ANA Y1 D261

I had a most awesome day yesterday. I got up at 4:13am and went full steam. First off was getting everything ready to make cupcakes. I got all my ingredients out to make sure I didn't miss anything. Then I went and washed my truck. It was covered in snow and dirt and really needed a bath. Came back and proceeded to make the most incredible rocky road cupcakes ever. Then I started a roast for tonight. We did have one issue in the morning. I went downstairs to get a bottle of wine to bring over last night and my fridge was dead!! I pulled it away from the wall and the motor was smoking. Thank god I went down there and was able to unplug it before it caught fire. The downside is I had to spend $600 on a new fridge. It will be here on Thursday. I shouldn't complain. I got 15 years out of that one. I had that one back with X2. Heck some of the wines in there have been in there since then. The new one is dual zone too so I can finally keep my reds and whites at different temps. It just sucks I had to spend the money. After that crisis we got on the road around 10:15 and arrived here just before noon. I used my diamond status and successfully got us an early check in. Score!! We had some lunch and did some driving. Just out of curiosity we went and looked at a house we saw online. It was really nice. I may do some more digging into it. We then went back to the hotel, had a little rest, and then the moment I have been dreading happened. I met C's mom! It went very well I feel. We had some drinks in the bar, talked for a while, and it ended up being a pleasant meeting. We had to excuse ourselves earlier than we wanted because they were later than planned. Her boyfriend was with her and he is meh, but the mom is great. We then went back up to the room and got ready for the party which is why we were here in the first place. We got there about 7 and stayed until 10. C's friends all seem to like me!! YAY! It was an excellent day. Got back to the room, had some late night room service, and crashed around 11:30. Today we're going through Frankenmuth and getting home for roast.

This so far has been a fucking wonderful weekend.

ANA Y1 D260

 I have so much shit to do before we leave this morning it's not even funny. I have to wash the truck, put in gas, finish packing, make cupcakes, and start a roast all before we leave. I have six hours. I also just woke up. Fuck. I am already stressed.

Had therapy. Taught. Annoyed at B. Long story. Happy with everything else. Took C clothes shopping. Got her new stuff for this weekend. Annoyed at cats. Annoyed at bills. Have shit to do. More later.

ANA Y1 D259

Well this weekend just got more interesting. I will be meeting C's mom. The dad has a doctor appointment and instead of C driving back and forth for 6 hours for a 20 minute appointment, the mom is going to meet us this weekend where we will be and take C's car. We're going to drive to the hotel in two different cars, then mom will pick up the car and head back home. How we get the car back has yet to be determined. Honestly C doesn't need one for a short while. She has maybe had to go somewhere by herself twice in the last month. So we will have to get it back at some point, but it's not end of the world. It's the better solution in the long run. But this means I will be meeting her for the first time (and her boyfriend but he's irrelevant). I have some nerves, yes. Fun.

Yesterday was what it was. Taught from 10:30 until 6, made dinner, watched tv, had some fun, went to bed. Didn't have enough time to really do much of anything else. Today will be more of the same but after class we're going to the mall for C to find something new to wear this weekend and to pick up ingredients to make cupcakes for the party tomorrow night. I am making rocky road cupcakes from one of my books. Hopefully they will be good.

Have therapy remotely this morning. Let's see how that goes.

ANA Y1 D258

I got a good night's sleep for once and woke up on my own at 5:30. Finally got over a 50% sleep score in my app. I feel rested for once. Go me.

Not too exciting day. I taught from 8:30 - 4:30 so that took up most of my day. Same thing today except 10:30 - 6:30. But that will take up the majority of the day obviously. We watched some tv after dinner, C wasn't feeling good and took a nice bath. I played some video games. We went to bed around 10. This is one of those times where I am okay with a quiet day. We are going sort of out of town again this weekend. We're going to where she used to live to hang out with her friends. They're having a housewarming party and since it's a decent drive, we're going to spend the night and make a weekend out of it. Nothing crazy. Just the one night. On the way home on Sunday we will stop in Frankenmuth and wander the shops there. So it's okay if we have a quiet week since we do have plans for the weekend. Tonight we may go to the mall as she wants to get something new to wear to the party. I get that for sure. I am excited to meet her friends and anxious at the same time. But I think it will all be okay.

It's raining outside. The snow has passed and we now enter wet times. I like it.

ANA Y1 D257

Yesterday turned out to be a rather insane day. I woke up later than I wanted so I was already off in the morning. I didn't sleep much either. I was not off to a good start. I headed off to the dentist around 11am after doing some morning work. The dentist went both good and bad. Turns out I am a bit of a celebrity there. I wrote a glowing recommendation for them after my first visit and well, apparently no one ever says anything nice about the dentist. They printed out my review, enlarged it, and put it on their breakroom wall. Oy. The main dentist and practice owner came to see me and was just so excited to meet me in person. Weirdest experience ever. Good news - my teeth aren't as bad as I feared. Bad news, I need scaling and a deep clean. One quadrant at a time, $200 a pop. Okay. But if I do it and go back to having regular visits, I can keep my teeth a long time. Works for me. I am starting this process in April. I did leave with my teeth feeling the nicest they have felt in a long time. Still very much love this dentist. 

Got home around 1, worked until a 3pm meeting. Went to get on the meeting and my mic was dead. I tried to fix it and lost keyboard. Then mouse. It was a comedy of errors. I unplug one everything works. I plug in the mic I lose everything. I am troubleshooting this while on the phone for this meeting. Crazy. I finally get it disassembled and discover from years of unplugging and plugging back in, the connector is shot to hell. When I would plug it back in it was shorting everything else out. Motherfucker. I teach the rest of the week and this was NOT the time for my mic to die. I had no backup that was suitable. I look up online and Best Buy near me has ONE in stock that will work. I switched to the slightly better Yeti X model. I didn't need to replace the boom arm, just the head so good. We get there after fighting commute time traffic and guess what? None. The whole shelf is bare. The employee is so overworked she can't even take the time to help. Fuck this. Out of here. Got in the truck, found the next closest location that supposedly also had one in stock. 35 minutes away. Fine. Ordered for pickup. Traffic is a nightmare. Get there and it's ready to go. Now we have to drive back home. In traffic. We didn't get back until almost 6:30 for a simple mic pickup. Still had to make dinner. Because of the dentist, I didn't eat all day either. I was hangry at this point.

Got home, made dinner, watched Top Chef and then had to hookup the new mic. Then I had to test. I had my coworker join a Zoom meeting but I needed to wait until they were free. It was almost 9 by the time I was all done. We then watched the last two episodes of season 3 of top chef. Got into bed around 11pm. LONG day. I also got constant posts from B on their birthday. Annoy. Once more, I must say, the longer we're apart, the more I see our incompatibility. Their day consisted of painting ceramics, Benihana, and who knows what else. That's not a birthday to me. But it's not my day so I have no place to say anything. I hope they had fun. 

Teaching in 3 hours. Back to the old grind.

ANA Y1 D256

I overslept this morning. Woke up at 5:20 and fell back to sleep until 6am. It's because we were up until midnight. Doing exactly what you think we were doing. Enjoying every minute of it too. 7th day of Feb, three times already. I know I need to stop making comments on this, but one, it's my blog, and two, I am just so happy. When all this hit went down, B said to me they want someone they're excited to kiss. Someone they just can't get enough of physically. Someone they need to feel passion for when they go to bed or wake up. I get it. I really do. We were apathetic of each other for too long. Hence why this is so exciting and just unbelievable to me. Anyway, I overslept.

Speaking of B it's their birthday today. Remember what we were doing last year this time? I do. I spent thousands of dollars to take them to Ohio and was in a hotel room. I took them to the zoo for them to pout all day. The beginning of the end kids.

As for me, I worked all day. Got prepped for this week's classes, did more marketing stuff. We took a break to get some dinner items and lunch, came back, worked some more. We had Honey Baked Ham for dinner. I had points and credit there. Had a turkey dinner with mac and cheese and cinnamon apples. We watched some tv, did what we did, then stayed up late. Twas a good day. 

Have a dentist appointment today. Actually looking forward to it.

ANA Y1 D255

110 days until this year is over. It feels like I was just going to Pearl Jam with the kid. It feels like yesterday that my world went weird. Yet, here I am. Coming down off a weekend trip with my girlfriend living the most authentic life I've ever lived. Still not divorced yet. That will come soon enough. At the current pace, I am expecting to file papers in March or April. Go back a year, let's see when I said we'd be divorced. Hold on, gonna look. August 24th/25th. That's when we had "the talk". That's when we decided to officially get divorced. That's nearly six months ago. Most people would have been well into the proceedings by now. We still haven't even filed paperwork. It's been since Nov 2 since we've lived together. That was three months ago. I told you all it would be odd and here we are. Oh well. Just living my best damn life.

We left around 7 yesterday, home by 9:30am. Made sure the cats were all good, unpacked, did laundry, and relaxed. Around 2 we went and did a pokemon community day, went to the grocery store, and had redemption pizza. We both were upset at the pizza we had while out of town. We wanted real pizza to make up for it. We watched some tv, went to bed around 10. 

Today I have voice therapy at nine, some things to do for work, and that's about it. I do teach three days this week which will keep me busy. Same thing next week. It's almost Valentine's Day. I need to stop and get cards on my way back from voice. I don't really feel like going today but I will.

For the record, I am still very happy in my relationship. I am tired of life in general - bills, B, the world - but between me and C, things are really good. I finally feel I have a partner that's in it with me. Not just for themselves. I don't feel like I am giving more of me than I can. I feel like I can be open and honest about how things are affecting me. I can share what's on my mind without it being taken the wrong way. I can express myself clearly without dancing around things. I always felt B and I had decent communication but there's something different now. I am not having to worry and think things through seven different ways before saying them. If something is bugging me or if something needs to be done, I can be direct. That's a big difference. I am truer to me and my partner like I have never been with any partner. If I am being honest, I still don't know how long this will last. At some point she's going to realize I am too old for her and want to move on. Okay. But at least I will have had this time and cherish every minute of it. I will hold how I feel right now with me forever. I know my worth.

ANA Y1 D254

While I am glad we came on Thursday, I am ready to go home. As anticipated, yesterday was a madhouse here. So many people. Traffic. It's like living in SoCal again. This is a tourist town. Which means if you live here, you don't go out on weekends. You stay at home. You got out Monday - Thursday. Long waits, crowded sidewalks, screaming children. No thanks. I'm ready to go.

We looked at six houses yesterday, went into two. No go. The first one was so old I was afraid it was going to fall apart as we stood in it. C even fell down the stairs they were so old and tiny. The second one was nice but too small for us. The second one was priced right, good neighborhood, and they will get offers and sell it this weekend. It was just not a good fit for us. It's okay. We met a realtor and now have connections here. Something will come up eventually that works for us. We went to the antique pavilion which was fun. We also had a really good lunch next door at a distillery. The day wasn't a waste by any means. We had a good time. We napped when we got back then went downtown to check out the ice sculptures. That's when I lost my energy. Just too many people. We had to wait until 8 to get dinner as it was so crowded out. We went back to the irish pub. Back to the hotel and in bed by 10. Heading home in a couple of hours. Have the day at home with our kitties. 

ANA Y1 D253

For the record, some "skills" you never really lose, they just go into remission until you need them again. Case in point, we drank for 11 hours yesterday. Seriously. We also walked 4.5 miles in the cold. My Fitbit says 6, but I don't think that's right. C's says 4.5 and I think hers is more accurate. Regardless, it was barely over double digits which also helped. At one point it was 10 degrees outside. We started the day in the room accidentally. I ordered us up some breakfast and asked for two mimosas. You know start out slow, right? They decided to give me an entire carafe of OJ and a full bottle of champagne and charge me for the price of two mimosas. Yep. $22. Okay. Well we opened it and I guess we had to finish it! We left the hotel around 10am and hit our first stop. We walked to this cute antique store where I found a new hat, a cute little retro purse, a napkin holder, and some handmade soaps. Score. From there we started looking at the ice stuff being setup. Nothing was ready yet so we made our way to the irish pub. I had 2 forbidden fruit donut ciders, then the bartender who is starting to like us, brought us over "something to try". It was delicious. Don't even know what the fuck it was. It was blue and tasted good. We then took coffee based drinks to go. We walked more and ended up in a winery tasting room. We had a six glass flight there. We did make a couple of pitstops at the hotel during the day to drop things off. When we ventured back out, we needed a snack. Hit up a gastropub where we had octopus and a giant pretzel. Also two more cocktails and a beer to go. Near there was a candle making store. We popped in and made custom candles. Picking those up today. We also had a little frozen custard next door to that. More walking and our final stop - a pizza place where we had two more beers and brought our pizzas back to the room. We proceeded to sit in bed watching top chef, eating pizza, and then you know what happened. We never left a 1-2 mile square radius. I lost an earring which pisses me off because it was one of my moose ones from Alaska. I'm hoping I lost it at the candle place. I also lost a scrunchy which is annoying. All in all, it was an incredible, much needed day. 

Today is open houses. Let's see what we find. Then we're going to look at the ice sculptures, figure out dinner, and head home tomorrow.

ANA Y1 D252

First we start with the important news, today is the kid's 30th. Dwell on that for a while. I am the parent of a 30 year old. JFC. I have a girlfriend and circle of friends younger than her. I barely feel that far past 30 myself. But it's true. 30 years ago, the best thing I've ever accomplished graced this world with her presence. I hope she has an incredible day.

We are out of town and it's wonderful. Started the morning off by doing some last minute packing and cleaning. I was ready to go by 8am but C still had plenty to do. I did some work so I didn't lose the whole day. Nothing exciting, but at least I left without any guilt. We got on the road around 1:30pm and the drive was uneventful. We rolled up right at 4pm and checked in. We're staying smack dab downtown. No need to drive anywhere if need be. If this were a business trip and my client was downtown, I couldn't ask for a better location. Plus we're staying at one of Hilton's boutique hotels. Only 54 rooms, very modern, updated, and chic. When we got into our room there were robes on the bed, chocolate waiting for us, and a $15 Starbucks gift card. The room feels very European and reminds me of something I would find in London. No carpet, modern furniture, cool artwork, large stone shower, etc. I really like it. The bed was super comfy and while I woke up earlier than I'd like, I am feeling okay. The room has huge windows and we left the drapes open last night. I first woke up at 1:53am and thought something was broken in the clock because there's no way it was only 2am and that bright out. Turns out it was the snow and lights all reflecting. We will not make that mistake tonight. Need them closed a bit please. 

As for us, after we unpacked, we went up to the top floor which is an event/bar area. Free drinks, live music, and a clientele we want nothing to do with. Seriously. Just a bit old and boring for our tastes. We quietly left and headed back to our room. We got situated and headed out for dinner. We went to the Paisley Pig. Wow. Excellent food. Just top notch. We started with whitefish dip, and spinach and artichoke dip. Then for a main course I had crispy duck and waffles while C had bluegill fish and chips. A wonderful meal. I have been needing an experience like that for a while. After dinner we looked at 2 houses. One was a big no because it was on a major street. The other, right down from the restaurant, I really like but it's a little more than I was hoping. There's a few more to look at and a bunch of open houses tomorrow I want to check out. We really like it here and it would be nice to move somewhere that felt more our style. We shall see what happens. We headed back downtown and ended up at an irish pub for dessert. We had some Guinness and chocolate brownie explosion. Wonderful. Here they do a "social district" thing where you can take your drinks to go so we got a couple of beers to go and headed back to the hotel. I have to tell you people, I haven't laughed and smiled as much as I did yesterday in the last few years. I am just at ease and feel good about myself. Don't get me wrong, I have to pay bills when I am done typing all this and that's going to suck, but at least I don't feel oppressed in my relationship. I don't feel a weight or depressed when I think about spending the next two more days here. I am happy, content, and at peace. It's a different kind of feeling than I have been used to. There was no drama yesterday. No yelling. No pouting. No having to look at six different restaurants. No, we went on an adventure and enjoyed the experience and each other's company. Today starts the ice festival and I can't wait to spend the day out there with C. I am so looking forward to what today brings.

ANA Y1 D251

I slept horribly last night. Just awful. First I had the kind of dream where you're not sure if you're awake or sleeping and you come in and out. Then I had dreams about my step father. First ones in a LONG time. Just not good. I am exhausted and annoyed already and it's 5:40am.

Spent the day reading blog posts. Had my doctor appointment. Picked up my new meds. Started them this morning. Made pasta with chicken for dinner. Watched top chef. Packed. We're leaving tonight for a 4 day weekend. I need out of town. I need to get out of here. 

ANA Y1 D250

Yesterday was fine until a salesperson tried to ruin my day. It was mostly not their fault. It seems some things got added to the training calendar incorrectly and they sold training on days I am not available. Like tomorrow. We tried to figure out what was going on with the calendar and we think we got it figured out, but it was an hour on the phone of going through the next two months to make sure he knew my availability and I knew what was in the pipeline. We got it all sorted out and it looks like I will have about 8-10 days of training in Feb I have to deliver. Okay. I am good with this. But it was a frustrating experience. The majority of the day was spent reading 8 year old blog posts. We have a couple hundred on our website and some are way out of date. I have to go through the entire list and decided what to keep, what to archive, and what to refresh. Yawn.

Made gnocchi with salmon for dinner. Watched some tv. Played some video games. We are both excited about going out of town this weekend. We also found 4 houses we want to try and look at while we're there. Who knows. Maybe we will move this year and start fresh. We will see. We also started looking up restaurants for our July trip. Yeah, we're weird like that. 

Today I have a doc appointment and hopefully will get on thyroid meds. Hopefully. Just one more thing I have to deal with every day. Yay life.