ANA Y5 D112

Silence

I am finding that six hours seems to be the sweet spot for me for hours of sleep and a silent head. More or less and I get screaming. No science behind that. Just observation. Regardless, it correlates. I need to track it and see. I can do a 30 day dump from my phone.

Did laundry, took care of house stuff. We went to sams club last night. I am now going to track our regular grocery spending for the next 6-8 weeks to see what we buy and how much. We should ONLY need perishables like dairy and produce for the next six weeks. If that holds true then the expirement is a success. By my calculations we got 40-45 meals from what we bought. More with leftovers. We shall see how it goes. Took us 2 hours to put everything away and packaged. Worth it though.

Today I have some work but nothing too pressing. 

ANA Y5 D111

Back to screaming.

I stayed up too late last night and now I am paying for it. Head is screaming, I feel like I have wasted the morning. I hate it.

Did laundry, cleaned, made dinner, streamed, took dog for a walk at like 11pm. Went to bed around 1. 

ANA Y5 D110

Silence so far

Had therapy yesterday. Discussed options for medications to help me when things get too loud in my head. We will see what happens when I talk to my primary. Worked all day. Finished moving files over. Had quesdillas for dinner. Watched a good movie. Good day overall.  

ANA Y5 D109

Silence

Much better day yesterday despite my ears. Being home makes all the difference in the world. Not sitting in dumb traffic or sitting in an office just for looks. We made nachos last night. C cooked and I cleaned. Was very nice. New phone came. But cleaning old one off first. Therapy this morning. Much needed. 

ANA Y5 D108

Scream

I spent most of yesterday pissed off. Pissed off I had to be in an office for zero good reason. Pissed off my head was screaming. I brought that all home with me and was a pain to be around all night. I need a solution to everything.  

ANA Y5 D107

Scream

But it's because it was loud as fuck last night in the restaraunt. So I am not surprised. We had a great night. Good food. Good laughs. Good sex after. Not bad after 4 years together. I worked all day, came home early, got dolled up, we went to dinner, had a great night. 

ANA Y5 D106

Silence

Today is our anniversary. Four years. Wow. Time flies. It never stops.

We're going to dinner tonight. We will go to art prize later in the month. Too much going on with work for both of us.

Off to work. 

ANA Y5 D105

Silence.

Tomorrow is our 4 year anniversary. 4 years. Where did they go? I am not complaining. This is still the healthiest relationship I have ever been in. 

C worked. I also worked in the house. I started moving boxes downstairs to make the upstairs look better. Got a lot accomplished. You don't walk in and feel crowded. Same with the closet room. I have more I can do, but not right now.

Not sure what I have to do today at work. Mostly meetings to start moving my shit to production. 

ANA Y5 D104

Screaming. Kicked back in around 2pm yesterday. 36 hour break. Joy.

Took dog to groomer, went to stores, cleaned house, did laundry. Made salmon for dinner. Watched tv. Played games. Went to bed. C works today so there goes my sunday. 

ANA Y5 D103

Still mostly quiet. Good.

Worked. C and I got into a major fight yesterday morning. The first real one in four years. Yelling. Really mad. We worked it out. She's overwhelmed. It's her job. I applied logic instead of compassion and it blew up in my face. We're good now. She got all her stuff done too. I am so proud of her. It all comes down to her job though. She needs to quit. Like now. Until then, it's a trigger. I just need to not pull it.

Dog groomer today. Joy.