Y10 D62

There's so much going on right now I don't know where to start. Let's go with the most important one and the one that kept me up all night:

The kid had to evacuate at 10pm last night. Yeah, you read that right. She is in the line of a bad fire and they had to get out. It was close enough for them to see. They got out and made it to the next town over where they had to check in to a shitty motel because it was all that was left. Here I am worrying about stupid things and she could lose everything. They grabbed the cats and the snake and piled into the car and drove. Welcome to life, the most fucked up thing ever. I am so scared and worried for her it's not even funny. I barely slept waiting for texts and phone calls. They got checked in at 1am. Fucked up shit right now. Don't be surprised if you see emails from me asking for donations to help replace everything they lose. Fucking fires.

Next on the list is my money isn't in the bank yet. It was supposed to be there Wednesday. Our moving is 100% contingent on this money being there and it isn't. Plain and simple. I need to follow up with my boss today to see what the hell is going on with that. He better not be backing out, because if he is then everything is shot to hell. All this time and energy wasted.

Which brings us to the fight B and I had last night. She is trying to plan moving and packing and I got her upset when I said WHY??. For me until the money is there this isn't real. For her it's happening. I am stressed out about being able to do it and she's already moving in her head. We're both right, but it's just not pretty.

Then there's work. Fuck work. I may have to work at midnight tonight to do more recordings because it's going to be 100 today and I can't do this shit during the day in that heat.

And fuck this heat. Heat advisory in effect until TUESDAY. We won't survive the weekend. It is going to be hell.

Then there's this fun fact nugget: I figured out last night I have never in my entire life lived anywhere more than 5 years. Ever. In 50 years on this planet, I have never had a 'home' for more than 5 years. Fun shit huh?

Sigh.

I am so tired. Just let it be over. All of it. Please?