Y3 D124

Ladies and gentlemen, we have L word. It was said last night. And no, it wasn't thrown out in the middle of some drunken throes of passion. Don't get me wrong, there was drunken debauchery yesterday, and there was throwing of passion later, but the moment actually came at our friend's housewarming party. We were standing on the stairs and it was blurted out by both of us. We both kind of were surprised, happy, and amazed all at the same time. We talked about it later when we got home, but the moment was fucking perfect. I don't know what this means in terms of our relationship changing or going to a different level, but we both know at this point there is nothing being held back and it feels extremely good.

The day started with me having very little sleep because of all of Saturday's fun. TGF came over around 11 and me, the kid, and TGF went to get iced coffee and screw around at the Halloween store. I think I found the costume I want to wear. It's a little pricey which means I have to wait until the first to get it, but it will be a hit for sure.

After that we came back to the house and I made food to bring to the party. This was a housewarming for the friends I helped move back in June. They finally have everything together and the house looks great. I am totally jealous of them because it makes me wish I still had a house of my own but I am also very happy for them. We got to the party around 3:30 and started drinking. Okay, I started drinking, TGF and kid didn't. The party was a blast. Lots of good people, lots of good food, and lots of good music. We stayed until about 9 and headed home. There was a little bit of an awkward moment for me during the party, but I think it's what led to our later moment.

See some of us were sitting around and the conversation turned to TGF and me. I felt uncomfortable being the center of the conversation for once especially about this topic. The upside is we were talking with people I consider to be good friends and I think the reason it was discussed was for them to get to know TGF more, and to show we had their support. That part felt good. It's nice to know these people care about us, see were are loyal and true to each other, and that we are happy. The weird part is I don't really like having to talk about something that shouldn't be anyone's business. However, at the same time, I know they were doing it to make sure they weren't backing a losing horse. For that I am grateful. It was after this conversation that the L emerged. I think the conversation had the same effect on both of us. We were put on the spot to publicly discuss our relationship and it made us both realize we did care deeply for each other, our friends support us, and those that don't can piss off.

Only dark cloud of last night was the kid. I know she was tired from the day before too, but she started brooding at one point which irked me. She knew what time we were going and when we were leaving. I knew TGF and her both had long days today as do I, so I didn't screw around. We left exactly when I said we would and I was sobered up at that point. I didn't need her brooding but I let it go because I think it had more to do with exhaustion than anything else. I also was informed from one of my other friends that the moment may be near. My little girl may be considering moving into the dark side of banging. Yeah, I am being blunt, but it's how I am wrapping my head around it. I won't be a hypocrite and I won't be righteous but I can still be a father. My friend said she would talk to the kid about certain things and I appreciate that. I hope she doesn't make any mistakes and I will support her no matter what.

We got home around 9:30 and the kid went off to bed. TGF and I went in the other room and talked about what happened earlier and then the passion started a flowing. She ended up leaving around 11 as she has school this morning and I have to leave in a few for my client.

I am supposed to go over to my director's tonight for a Walking Dead marathon, but I honestly don't know when I will finish up today or how tired I will be. I am playing it by ear for now. I may just want to come home and unwind. TGF has dance until 9 and she will probably go straight home. I could use the sleep anyway. Off to do it...