Had a frustrating day again yesterday. I was supposed to be at a client but it fell through so I ended up at home all day with both B and the kid. The tension between all the people in the house kind of came to a mini head yesterday. The morning was fine; we all got up and juts hung out. I was catching up on some reading for work, they were off in the bedrooms playing Sims. Thank god I have enough computers around here for everyone. I decided to go to the store around 11 to pick up some groceries and lunch for everyone. That's where things started going downhill. Some of it is definitely my fault, but not intentional. I am trying to learn everything B will and will not eat. She has a much different palette than me or the kid. Mostly because she hasn't been introduced to things. She doesn't know if she likes certain things because she has never been exposed to them. I brought home sushi for lunch. I keep thinking she has the same likes and tastes as we do. She mentioned the other day she feels like a bit of a third wheel because the kid and I have such a close relationship and we have all these inside jokes, like the same music, etc. Yesterday was an example of that. The kid loved the sushi where as B just kind of picked around things. I wrote that off and moved on. Around 3 I suggested we all go get tea. Now it was the kid's turn to feel like a third wheel. We came home and I put on a roast while they all went off and hid. I said fuck it and went out for a walk. I am having a hard time trying to please everyone all the time.
Add to all this that I was at the same time trying to help a fellow cast member. She has been receiving some unwanted advances from another cast member and no one in power has been taking her seriously. I helped her put together all the screenshots of the texts he has sent and got our cast advisor involved. I am hoping now that I have helped get them talking my role will be done at least for a while.
Back to the house drama. KBF came over and started showing the kid pictures of the apartment he went and looked at. Now I started feeling bad because I should be feeling sad she is discussing moving out but I am only feeling elation. I felt like a horrible person because I was like "and you can take the dresser and your desk!". I made dinner for everyone (roast, smashed potatoes, and vegetables in a cheese sauce) and we watched Dr Horrible together. Yet one more thing B didn't understand because kid and KBF had been watching for a few minutes when we started eating. I have seen it countless times and knew what was going on, but B was lost which frustrated her. Then after dinner, once more everyone went away leaving me with all the dishes, all the cleanup, and all the anger. I cleaned the kitchen and then just went outside to breathe. B knew something was wrong but couldn't figure it out. She made me go into the bedroom with her and wouldn't let me leave until I explained everything. Which I did. I told her how much of a failure I felt all day because I couldn't make everyone happy. Because I didn't feel bad about the kid leaving. Because I haven't figured out how to make her food. All of it.
She comforted me in a way I have been missing in my life. I would have before just gone out to drink my troubles away. This time I got to talk them through and feel better. Amazing what another person in your life will do for you. We ended up sitting in the bedroom talking for almost 2 hours. After we came out to the living room and played Bananagrams followed by Flux. We went off to bed around 11 and she told me to sleep since I had to be up early today, but instead it led to some damn good sex. Not complaining. On that front my life is really doing well. REALLY well.
I fell asleep around midnight. I know she was up for a while because her twitter posts show her up later than me. No big deal. She had massive caffeine in her tea on top of a Mtn Dew during the day. It all caught up to her. I have a feeling she will sleep pretty late this morning.
Today I am FINALLY meeting with the client. Let's see if this is an hour long session or an 8 hour session. It's all in flux depending on how much access he has been able to get us.
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