Y3 D152

I am extremely exhausted again this morning. Mentally and physically. I took it quite easy yesterday but having to get up this morning and deal with the real world is killing me.

Got up around 10 yesterday and started putzing around. TGF, the kid, and KBF all got up around 11. I fed everyone eggs and french toast. We all then proceeded to be lazy as fuck and watch Buffy and Nightmare Before Christmas. The last one was to get us in the mood for the amusement park later in the day. I was able to take it beyond the original four of us and at one point had almost 11 people lined up to go. In the end it was 7 which before the end of the night dwindled to 5, but was still fun.

We headed out to the park around 5:30. KBF ended up not going because he wasn't feeling well. Luckily one of my friends stepped in and was the kid's 'date' if you will so she wasn't riding on rides as a solo. It still sucked because we were an odd number all night and at some point there was someone who was alone. Fuck it.

God, I am having trouble focusing right now...

The park was incredible. A huge thanks to my buddy who got us the passes. It was so well done. We went in everyone of the haunted mazes and areas they had setup. I have to say it was an emotional blast for me being there with TGF. X2 never got into shit like this. She hated Halloween which deadened me for the longest time because I love it. For years I pretended like I didn't care while inside I was screaming. I love the whole concept of the day. It was such a classic bf/gf situation. She was getting all scared and pulling my arms around her; felt very close and right. I NEED this. It's keeping me solid. The whole time my brain was screaming but I pushed it down and enjoyed the moment.

We rode on some of the roller coasters but stayed focused on the haunt attractions. Six different mazes/zones to explore. The last one we hit was where our friend was working. It was almost 11 and we were all tired as hell but wanted to see him. It drove the other actors in the maze nuts though because we kept walking through shouting his name. And every time one of them tried to scare us we would look and go "Name? No you're not Name." They pretty much gave up trying to scare us because they knew were focused. The people behind us must have thought we were nuts. When we finally found him at the end we gave him a giant group hug. Here's five people hugging a werewolf and bouncing up and down like idiots. Makes me smile even thinking about it right now. It was great.

Got home a little after midnight and went right to bed. Worth it? Yes. We were so close and had so much fun that the physical tiredness of today I can handle.

Now for the mental. I am hoping to resolve the IRS money issue today. Dear god I need help or I have no rent money come Friday.

See, there I go. Thinking which leads to pain which leads to...