Y4 D33

Worked really late last night. Up until about 11:30. But this morning I have one thing left on my plate for this round and that should only take me an hour or two. Then I am free from this client for a while. I just need to hang on for about a week and a half and I am on vacation. Granted it won't be much of a vacation unfortunately. But my group stuff is paying off in a way.

I have been stressing because originally I was going to spend a whole week out of town, in Disneyland, hanging with friends, etc. Because of the IRS shit, that plan got scrapped. Then I found out I couldn't afford a hotel room for the time I wanted to go without the money I was hoping for from the state. Well yesterday I was all pissy about it because I am down to the wire for making reservations and stuff. And I started to distort in my head and get all defeatist and depressed. But THEN I used one of the techniques in the book that I have learned and bam, I went from anger and frustration to finding a compromise which while I am not 100% happy, I am certainly not as upset as I was. In the end I will still be able to go away but only for four days. This is okay. I can handle this. Not what I wanted, but in the end it's probably better for me financially. A compromise. Now I am still taking the whole week off,  but I will just chill at home for three days and use the time to rearrange furniture, finish a painting project I have wanted to start, and relax. See? Good compromise.

After dealing with that in the morning I started working. All day. Until 4:30 when I went to group. We were down to four of us. The first week had 8, second week had 10, but now there is just 4. You can tell who is serious about it and who isn't. I personally am enjoying being able to open up about things in a room of non-judgmental people. People who in their own way are as fucked up as me. We discussed social interactions and support yesterday. We had to fill out this chart for each type of social need a person has with names of people and if that was enough, not enough, or none. On one hand for the boxes I was able to fill in, I was happy. On the other though, there were four empty boxes on the sheet. Not just one or two people, empty. That sucked. But those four boxes all had one thing in common; they all related to the type of person one would consider a significant other. It's no wonder mine were blank. Meh. Someday. Or maybe not. It doesn't matter any more.

Got home about 7:30, made dinner, then at 8:30 got back to working. Now to finish up this last one thing on my plate.