Y4 D11

Not sure how I am feeling this morning. Yesterday while not bad, was not all that good either. It was a pretty flat day overall I would have to say. I can't really pinpoint anything other than as I mentioned, I didn't sleep well Sunday night so I was off all day. The weather was awful, raining, overcast, dark, which didn't do much for my mood. Matter of fact it made things worse. I couldn't get motivated or over my hump of dragging. I decided in the morning I needed to do something for myself to try and get out of the funk so I went at 4:30 for a quick spa service. Nothing fancy, just an eyelash tint. I noticed the other day how white/blonde they were and this service always makes them look better. It's relatively inexpensive, lasts for weeks, and makes me look awake even if I am not. That was the most exciting thing I did yesterday. Woo? Otherwise, I worked, made dinner for the kid, sat around, watched X-Files with her at night, kept converting movies, had my buddy find me a movie for the girl I was talking to the other night, chatted a little with her (not as much as I would have liked but it's okay), and then around 9 took a sleeping pill. I swear to god I am the only person I know whose body can have a sleeping pill in it and still have it go - no, fuck you, I don't want to sleep. I didn't fall asleep until almost 1 even with the pill inside me. What I need are the two weekends this month without shows. I have to get through this weekend, but then I get two back to back all to myself. That will allow me to get on something of a regular sleep pattern again I hope. I am forcing myself to try and sleep which is part of the problem. Even if I fall asleep on the couch tonight, I need to let it happen naturally. Screwed up sleep makes for a screwed up head. I have group tonight. I am hoping it goes better than last week. Again, it wasn't bad, but it wasn't great either. EVERYTHING seems a bit meh to me today. Is it the stuff/activity/etc or is it just me? Am I meh for some reason? I don't know. I don't know much of anything right at this moment.