Y2 D21

Ow. What was that? Oh the cold hard bitchslap of reality. I may have fucked up beyond repair this time. My antics and insanity may have cost me my job.

Seems that 4 of the 16 people in my class last week found me a little to eccentric and out there for their conservative tastes and decided to complain against me. The biggest complaint was the class moved too fast for them. I really don't think I should be held accountable for that though. I constantly was asking the class for feedback on the pace and made sure everyone was on the same page. They also were pissed that I let them out ahead of schedule each day. What?? Who complains about that?? But the way the comment was phrased is what fucked me - "He seems more interested in getting us out of here early to drink than teach us". Um, bullshit? I sat there every fucking day asking if anyone would like to stay later to work on issues. I was there BEFORE them every day to help anyone with questions. Oh and then I got slammed for texting during class. Yep I did. Because I was checking on my sister's status as she had major surgery while I was out there and was in the hospital. Best one? I took off my shoes at one point because my feet hurt. Five minutes, tops. Unprofessional? Fine. Whatever. The only thing I will take responsibility for is a few off hand comments that I made. Yeah, I will accept that. I read the room wrong and my personal life was where it shouldn't have been.

End result? The client bitched, we have to refund their money, I lose my job possibly. Best case? I have to repay the company the lost revenue for the class. Roughly $20 - 30k. Nice. Just one more fuck up by the master.

The weird thing? I was so low in the morning but guess how the night ended? In the second row of an Eddie Money concert with my daughter wearing Eddie Money's sunglasses. Don't ask. I don't get it either. I don't know whether to laugh, cry, or just pull the fucking trigger.

I am going to lay low for a few days. Let this burn down and see what happens. I may be homeless soon...